In this Reddit video, a man whistles atonally to summon an American Bald Eagle for breakfast. Click on the video below to listen.
I can only whistle atonally myself. It took me forever to learn how to blow a note. It wasn’t until my friend suggested I use my actual fingers to shape my cheeks into the proper formation that I learned the ancient art. Within a week, I was whistling Dixie. I can now wolf-whistle at the ladies.
This video was posted to the “Absolute Units” subreddit, although it could’ve easily been on the “Nature is Fucking Lit” subreddit. This is how zoomers talk. Everything is litty, no cap.
Reddit used to be a libertarian paradise for nerds, but it’s long since morphed into something truly evil after the mysterious death of its founder. I still feel compelled to visit every day, just like I do Yahoo, and a handful of other sites I hate. I tell myself it’s to keep tabs on the enemy’s propaganda, but it’s really just an obsessive compulsion at this point. The internet is dead. Society has checked out. We’re all just waiting for the AI to take over and be worshipped as a God.
Even on the above post, the user sees it fit to propagandize the usual crap you can get from any Blackrock-funded corporation. He isn’t necessarily a professional astroturfer. Everyone is an unpaid shill these days. Although he might be paid, or a bot. Remember when Reddit revealed that Eglin Air Force Base was their most Reddit-addicted city? How about Gallowboob outed as a professional marketer? Or Operation Mockingbird? All the world’s a psyop.
I just came to chew bubblegum…and I’m all out of bubblegum.
